I was sitting at home one evening thinking about all my life choices I’ve made and the ones that still need to be made. Anyone who overthinks a lot can relate that it is a daunting feat to be constantly deliberating on every choice.
Often we think we need to have all the answers and that at some point in our lives we should have it all figured out. But does anyone really have everything figured out? Is that not the beauty of life that there is always something new to figure out. Is this not what life is about, the changes, challenges and opportunities?
As I sat overthinking everything, My housemate at the time could see how far I was in thought, when she sat next to me and asked me why I was stressing so much about life.
She is Buddhist and having such a deep connection to her beliefs she imparted on me some words that really made me think about more that than what I was facing and how simple it is to let go and believe that everything will work out as it should.
She started by telling me how silly it was that I am starting out my life so stressed ( I might add that I am almost a decade younger than she is.) She asked me why would anybody who has so much to look forward to, would want waste time on the little problems that if we just let go of will not even matter in five years. At first I was offended, I mean who is she to tell me that my problems are little… But then I listen to what she had to say and honestly I feel like a weight was lifted off my chest, I mean heck yes I’m still young, why exhaust myself now worrying over everything especially that which I have no control over.
Sometime we just need to hear these things and realize that it’s okay or at least it will be.
I have come to understand that the reason we are not alone is because we couldn’t possibly have all the answers to everything. What would be the point of life if we just had everything figured out at once. It is okay not to have all the wisdom of the world, that’s why we are surrounded by others, to love, to learn from, to help and be helped.
This is what travelers love about traveling, its not always the places we see, but often it’s the people we meet. The perceptive of life differs from person to person, culture to culture and it can made such a difference in our own lives to learn from them.
- It’s okay to love yourself.
We can deny it, but we can never truly love others if we don’t know how to love ourselves and I think that speaks for itself.
- Feel what you feel
When you face what you feel, you have the power to control it. You can see it manifesting and then you can manage it. If you turn away or put your back against it, you only blind yourself, the feelings hit you when you’re least prepared and it has the power over you.
When you are sad, angry or scared; Feel the sadness, anger, fear and let it in. Explore it. Understand why you have those feelings. Learn to manage and then accept them. Agree they are there and it is okay. Face them and you will over time realize how easy it is to let go.
- Let go
Recognize that when you hold on to something you are only sinking your own ship often at the expense of something that adds no value or purpose to your life. By holding on to that which poisons or depletes you only means you are stealing your own happiness. Breathe, accept what you are and know where you are going, that is your gift to yourself.
- Experience the moment
With each moment experience it. Everyday comes with its own energy, don’t waste it thinking, regretting your choices from the past or meditating on your mistakes, you are spending energy on things you cannot change. Likewise dwelling on tomorrow uses the energy you need for today, tomorrow will come and if it doesn’t then you only wasted time you could have used to manifest greatness today.
- 23 is pretty damn young
When you think that there are people who are 40, 45, 50+ you see how much experience they have, they have gone through their own trials and glories. 23 is still new and now, so why start your life out stressing and worrying over 100 things that not only will not actually materialize but also that in 10 years’ time will not matter. Use your young energy to build the life you want. It does not matter where you came from, who loved you, hurt you or forgot you. What is important is that you choose to create the life you want, learn from the lessons and achieve what you believe in.
“The only reason we think we don’t have time is because we spend all of it worrying about the time we think we don’t have.”
The longer we wait to learn to control our mind the harder it becomes. Learn to quieten your mind now, so you will be able to control is later. Meditating is a powerful tool in balancing our emotions and connecting us to who we are and that which surrounds us.
- You might be stressing about others but they are already stressing about themselves
Spend more time on yourself, I’m not saying that we shouldn’t care about others, we should and we should always help where we can. What I mean is the sooner we realize that often the people we stress over are already stressing about themselves, the better. So instead of stressing about everyone, rather use your energy to support them.
- When you smile and make others happy, you are creating an energy that returns the happiness to you.
The magic in healing others is that we actually end up healing ourselves, when we make someone happy, or add joy to their lives, that happiness spent is happiness gained and that gift we think we give to others is actually a gift we are giving to ourselves.
- Fighting with others is difficult but when you fight with yourself it’s worse. You cannot protect yourself from others if you cannot even protect yourself from you.
When we fight with elements around us it can be tough, but we can always get away from it. We can move on, we can run away. Yet when we fight with elements within ourselves we are always faced with them. Deal with the struggles, don’t dwell on them. Use the struggles as steps to lift yourself up, transcend the mistakes and lessons into building blocks of your future and create a life you want to live.
- What the mind thinks the heart knows.
It’s okay to have conflict between your head and heart. Because your head is telling you what you think you should know, it processes based on what it thinks it sees. But your heart is connected to a greater source that tells you what it does know. It’s not called a gut feeling for nothing and this is the universe sending a warning or guiding us. Use your heart to guide you and your head to manage it.
Above all be happy with who you are, love where you are and life with give you more to be grateful for and more to love.
Despite learning to understand all this at 23,these words are pretty relevant for anyone, at any age and place really. Listen more to what others have to say, we never know when it might answer questions we didn’t even know we had.
I hope you feel inspired to live a little more and be more because the only person who is going to get you there is you! ♥